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How to Be a Douchebag

Watch more Bad Behavior videos: Subscribe to Howcast's YouTube Channel - Learn how to be a douchebag -- or avoid being one -- with these tips. Howcast uploads the highest quality how-to videos daily! Be sure to check out our playlists for guides that interest you: Subscribe to Howcast's other YouTube Channels: Howcast Health Channel - Howcast Video Games Channel - Howcast Tech Channel - Howcast Food Channel - Howcast Arts & Recreation Channel - Howcast Sports & Fitness Channel - Howcast Personal Care & Style Channel - Howcast empowers people with engaging, useful how-to information wherever, whenever they need to know how. Emphasizing high-quality instructional videos, Howcast brings you experts who provide accurate information in easy-to-follow tutorials on everything from makeup, hairstyling, nail art design, and soccer to parkour, skateboarding, dancing, kissing, and much, much more. Step 1: What is a douche? Know what a douchebag is: an obnoxious, pretentious, self-important jerk who's oblivious to their own ridiculousness. Step 2: Have an outsized ego Have an outsized ego. Be convinced that you are smarter, sexier, and more talented than anyone else on the planet -- and don't let any evidence to the contrary convince you otherwise. Tip Whether you're bragging or bitching, compare yourself to legendary figures. Step 3: Be an office douchebag Be the reigning douchebag at work by repeating what colleagues say -- in slightly different, more pretentious language -- and then packaging as your own idea. There's no better way to win office enemies. Step 4: Be a misogynist Be a misogynist. Douchebags feel superior to women in every way, even if they pay lip service to equality. They also believe they're irresistible to the gender they so demean. Step 5: Be a one-upper Constantly one-up friends. Sure, your preening pomposity will drive people away, but you'll master the art of the put-down. Step 6: Clean up your act If you've recognized yourself in any of these behaviors, do everyone a favor and clean up your act. Because you don't really want to be a douchebag, do you? Did You Know? Self-proclaimed psychic John Edward was dubbed "The Biggest Douche in the Universe" in an episode of the animated series _South Park_.
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